ELAINE Owen could be called the 'lucky one' or a 'survivor', but it makes little difference when she is still living the nightmare of a horror road crash 30 years ago.
On January 25, 1978, Elaine, who was 29, her husband David Owen, 27 at the time, and son Craig, aged 18 months, were driving along the Calder Freeway to visit family just outside of Kyneton.
They were two hours away from their destination when a drunk-driver's car and their own collided head-on, pushing them up against a road embankment, causing the trailer they were towing to ram into the back of their car.
The other driver had a blood-alcohol reading of 0.286. He and his wife died instantly, but the young couple's baby survived.
Every side of the Owen's family car was smashed in.
"My memory of that whole week is gone, but we were told by ambulance officers in the hospital that they thought we had to be dead," Elaine said.
David was not expected to survive the ambulance trip to the Royal Melbourne Hospital where he and Elaine were admitted for emergency surgery.
Craig was taken to the Kyneton District Hospital with burn marks from his baby seat.
"We had serious head injuries. My face was smashed in when I hit the dashboard. They had to use plates to rebuild my face; it wasn't recognisable. My jaw had been severed in half, so they clamped it shut and I had to be fed through a tube." Elaine said.
"My internal organs ruptured because of the seatbelt. I had multiple fractures to my skull and it was so swollen they couldn't operate for up to eight weeks after the accident."
Elaine spent 10 weeks in hospital including rehabilitation.
Once discharged, she went to live with her parents in South Oakleigh and then two weeks later returned to the family's Lilydale home with David.
The couple were never offered counselling or at-home support.
Elaine believes if she had access to counselling, it might have prevented the onset of post-traumatic stress disorder 10 years after the crash.
"We just got on with life, but we struggled to look after ourselves.
"[After hospital] David and I had to sleep with a row of pillows between us so we couldn't hurt each other if we rolled over."
As a consequence of the head injuries, Elaine is legally blind in her left eye.
In April, doctors told her she only had three years of sight left in her right eye.
Three months later Elaine was diagnosed with leukaemia.
She is still struggling to come to terms with the latest setbacks.
"I understand that trauma happens in life. You don't expect life to be without its incidents. But this was just getting too much. You think, 'what else is going to happen to me?' - all because of one drunk-driver."
"My family keeps me going, especially our sons. You want to be around for them.
"I have close friends who I can talk to, but even then, you don't want to burden them with 'Oh woe is me'.
"Most of it, I kept to myself."
Aside from her situation, Elaine is constantly reminded of the tragedy of road trauma.
Last Sunday, four teenagers were killed on the Westgate Freeway when the car they were travelling in hit a tree.
"What a waste, what an unnecessary waste," Elaine said.
"It makes me angry that people can be so reckless and have such disregard for the other road users.
"People are so arrogant on the roads. You're driving a lethal weapon. If you're at work operating machinery, you don't do it while you're drunk, you don't eat food, you're not putting on make-up, changing the radio station or texting on your mobile."
Elaine said she could only feel anger towards the drunk-driver who turned her life upside down.
She is also angry that his friends and family members didn't stop him from getting behind the wheel.
"If you're in that situation you have to take the keys off them. I can live with that person's anger from me taking their keys, but I couldn't live with the consequences if they killed themselves or someone else."
For three years, Elaine has been a volunteer speaker with Road Trauma Support Victoria's traffic offender program and believes she's making a difference.
Seni or Sergeant Ron Perrett, based at Springvale police station, is the division traffic co-ordinator for the municipalities of Casey, Greater Dandenong and Cardinia.
In his nine years working with the major collision unit, Senior Sergeant Perrett quickly learned that road smashes were rarely accidents.
"Unless it's an act of God, like a tree falling on your car, road collisions are preventable."
He said that too often the Christmas holiday period was a time of tragedy for families.
"It's usually the three main causes: speed, impaired driving from alcohol or drugs, and fatigue."
He urged people to plan alternative travel arrangements for Christmas parties, and for employers to organise other transport such as buses or taxi vouchers.
Senior Sergeant Perrett also warned about the dangers of driving to the country for holidays.
"People from the city are not used to travelling long distances on country roads. Travel sensible distances and have frequent breaks. Make sure you get a good night's sleep, and drive when your body clock is normally awake."
RTSTV provides free statewide counselling for people who have been affected by road trauma.Visit www.rtstv.org.au or call 1300367797.
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